In Search of a Life Less Ordinary

The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence, so the saying goes. It’s simple human nature to look at other people’s lives and other things that we don’t have in general through rose-coloured glasses.

Most expats-in-waiting spend every available minute researching and watching other people’s lives on other sides of the world, dreaming of one day living their own new life in a completely new country. We did… and, upon moving to Australia in 2006, we found the grass to be not only greener but a far more interesting and exciting shade of green as we went on our search for a life less ordinary.

The trigger for our move

We arrived in Australia in the summer of 2006 with our two dogs and the entire contents of a 3-bedroom house, as we looked for a change to the monotony of our current lives. Bored with the humdrum of our 9-5 routine and keen to seek out a more stimulating life for ourselves, we opted to head to my wife’s home city of Sydney.

The Pacific Ocean meets the Australian mainland.

When I now look back four years later, I wonder what exactly was the catalyst that gave rise to the decision to leave. Oddly enough, I think it was a conversation with a gym buddy that did it. He was moving to Australia, we wanted to move overseas, and that was that.

I’m not sure at what point Sydney became a serious contender. My wife’s Australian citizenship obviously played a large part in the decision but her family were from the Blue Mountains, a fair distance from Sydney, which appealed to us on an altogether different level. Maybe it was the large number of world class beaches within a thirty kilometre radius, the sparkling blue harbour with its delightful inlets and waterways, the generally laidback way of life, or the ability to go for a long run on the sand in the morning, put on your suit and work in the bustling, cosmopolitan city in the daytime, then go out for a quick sail in the evening. Whatever the reason, in mid-2006 we flew across the ocean and into Australia, as Sydney welcomed us into its sun-kissed arms. 

Leaving friends and family

It was a traumatic time, saying farewell to family and friends with no idea if, and when, we would ever return. Emotions ran high and tension was ever present. Loved ones were inevitably upset/angry/annoyed, friends questioned our decision, and work colleagues thought we were mad. Yet the key was being brave and reminding ourselves of the reasons for leaving in order to stay the course in search of a better life.

Our new life Down Under

Make no mistake that picking your life up and moving it to a foreign country is no small undertaking. It’s fair to say that leaving loved ones, selling the house you’ve worked hard for, putting your dogs on a plane for who-knows-how-long, even giving up the job you’ve worked at for the past five years, is a huge deal. But we’d made the decision to make the break and now there was no turning back. We broke the news to family and friends, we dreamed of our new life in Australia, and we visualised getting on the plane and leaving for that beautiful new environment.

The visa process

There was just one small matter to take care of… the visas. To emigrate to Australia, most people apply for a skilled workers visa by way of a points system. For us, it was more straightforward.  My fiancée (who is now my wife) is Australian, which meant that I could apply for a spousal visa. The paperwork was still significant but the process was fairly quick and relatively painless.

However, we also did plenty of background research to inform our decision. We attended immigration fairs, signed up to expat forums, spoke with distant relatives in our chosen new home, and undertook endless searching for information on the web. This culminated in a fact-finding trip to Sydney one year before our move to look at areas to live in, jobs to work at, and things to see and do. We were now ready to go.

In January 2006, the envelope landed on the doormat. Immediately, the house went up for sale and we got the pups ready for travel. I left my job early and began readying us for the move and, in June 2006, we set sail for our brand new adventure on Sydney’s Northern Beaches.

The odd one out

It’s worth pointing out that living in a foreign country is harder than you could ever imagine.  I’m not referring to the hardship of moving to a new town or city, or the issues associated with buying houses, cars, and other such material possessions.  I’m referring to the difficulty of simply fitting in.  In short, you’re a stranger in an alien environment.  Your family is absent, you’re pretty much mate-less and, unless you do something about it fast, that’s the way it’s going to stay.

My wife and I on Sydney Harbour

In my previous life, I’d spend Friday nights down the local pub with my chums, Saturday mornings in the gym or in town bumping into old acquaintances, and maybe Sunday afternoons catching up with school friends, their partners and, of course, my family.  However, in moving to Australia, I created a situation in which I left behind those friends I’d have a ‘bit of banter’ with.  My family were no longer present, no cousins or aunts and uncles to visit nearby.  I didn’t recognise passers-by in the street and heard no warm “hello” from familiar faces in the shopping mall. 

I initially found it hard to adjust, and I plain and simply missed my family.  I was pining for friends and craving familiarity.  I had plenty of good pals back home so I was reluctant to join social clubs or make enough of an effort with new acquaintances.

It’s often assumed that, when moving to a new city/state/country, fitting in is easy and happens naturally but it isn’t and it doesn’t.  The lesson I learned was that you need to leave your comfort zone and put yourself out there.  To really make the most of your new life as an expat, you simply have to be positive and outgoing. Most of all, you must always cherish and respect the home you’ve left behind whilst embracing your new environment, new friends, and new life less ordinary. Don’t ever look back – you’re about to embark on the most exhilarating adventure in making your home from home! 

Russell V J Ward

Russell is a British expat living on Sydney’s northern beaches in New South Wales, Australia. A keen writer in his spare time, Russell also spends time travelling the world and enjoying life by the ocean. Russell lived in the UK until 2003, before emigrating to Canada (Vancouver and Ottawa), then most recently to Sydney, Australia (his wife’s home city).

Read more about his expat adventures on his website In Search of a Life Less Ordinary. 

Russell Ward

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